Oh you don't know the shape im in!

NO WORK

2010-09-27T15:56:00.000-07:00

I CANT FIND WORK, I CANT FIND WORK, I CANT FIND WORK, I CANT FIND WOOORRRRKKKKKKK!!

SO I WILL WATCH SEASON 7 OF TOP CHEF AND FEEL HUNGRY.

Fireworks and 1000 lakes

2010-08-08T09:40:00.000-07:00

Hey guys!
Sorry I haven't blogged in awhile, but we broke down in Vegas got stuck for two days and then drove from Vegas to Lawrence, Kansas (which is a 21 hour drive). But it was worth it as Lawrence, Kansas and the Replay lounge ruled it! It wasn't what I expected from the midwest.
The next night we were in Liberty Missouri at the Retro lanes bowling alley. Now this was exactly what i expected from the mid-west!! The show was put on by an old fellow named August, he used to be a pretty famous sound man, doing sound for Sly and the family stone and many more.
Now he's kind of a sad, washed up, lonely guy. He really loves Purple Rhinestone Eagle and he did a great job of the sound. Next time though I think we will go to Kansas city proper as we caught word that there were a bunch of kids that wanted to see the girls but couldn't get to Liberty...
On the way through Iowa there were signs for giant fireworks box stores. So i whined a bit about really wanting to go into one because of my affinity for explosives and the fact that Canada sucks and we can only get them for one week around halloween. Ashley was kind enough to stop and I basically turned into a five year old kid in a candy shop! I bought a giant firework shaped like a beer! SERIOUSLY!!
Next on the tour was a Minneapolis house show and that's where I am now. There were tornado warnings in place yesterday as we drove into Minnesota (another thing i love, drastic weather).
This had to be hands down the hottest basement show I have ever been too!! It was out of control hot. But the girls killed it as usual, Ashley stripped down to a bra it was so hot. After their set was finished we all proceeded to get really drunk really fast! I couldn't keep up with my thirst so for one reason or another I stripped off my clothes and jumped into a gross kids pool that was on the front lawn of the house. It was awesome and the next thing you know everyone else is stripping down and jumping in. Then the sky opened up and lightning and thunder ripped through drenching the streets with rain. Corrie from Kitten forever suggested we go night swimming. There's nothing like a skinny dip in a thunder storm on a hot summer night.

Were off to Madison Wisconsin today and I'm letting the girls sleep in a bit as the drive is only four hours.

Still in Vegas

2010-08-04T08:34:00.001-07:00

The Van's power steering pump was shot.
Were still in Vegas! Bye, bye money.

Vegas baby! Ugh.....

2010-08-03T02:33:00.000-07:00

So In S.F. the tour van didn't start right before we were about to load to leave for Oakland. Morgan got on the horn with AAA and as I like to put it AA, as in when shit like that happens i feel like i need to call my sponsor! So her and I were waiting around for AAA/AA and I had a brain fart that goes back 4 years when Eli and I went to see a Canucks game and we got one of those deals where to eat an Monks and you get tickets and they drive you in a shuttle bus to the game. So her and I were in the shuttle bus with all these gray hairs and rich folk, when the bus wouldn't start and the guy was trying and trying, basically he flooded the engine. So Eli was like, "Give it a minuet and it'll start right up." So he did and low and behold it did, so we were off to the game (Oilers VS Canucks).
That's what I thought of in that moment and said to Morgan maybe just give it another try it might have just been flooded? And that fucking DIO it was and it fired right up!!! So we loaded and headed to Oakland. Pins of light fucking RULE! Jake is a total bro. Also Genesis climber and Flood were great as well.
We crashed with amazing girls from the Bay area booking collective and in the morning they fed us delicious bacon with fresh eggs from their chickens in the yard.

Unfortunately things have gotten a little more difficult today (last night was Santa Cruz and it was fine) we missed an exit and got a bit lost on the way to Nevada so it was a long drive. We're at an econo lodge right now and as we pulled in the power steering died in the van???????!!!!
So were up tomorrow trouble shooting the problem and then off to Denver which is 12 hours away.
I feel insecure today, it sucks. It's also hot as hell.

No sleep to brooklyn

2010-07-31T10:58:00.000-07:00

Thursday in Portland went pretty well but it was nothing compared to Friday in San Fransisco!!!
The kids in SF love to rock n' roll. Crowd surfing, surging the stage and knocking out Morgans pedals. Ton's of FUN!!
Tonight were in Oakland with Pins of light (Jake from Hightowers other project) It'll be a different crowd from last night, more of my style of booking, a little more riff-centric support acts.
I went from Wednesday to Friday to 2:30am without sleep and other than my mouth having words come out in the wrong order it really wasn't that bad.
Today Ashley and I are going to go visit Sam Adato's drum shop and talk Vista Lights with him... and metal hair cuts.

Parenthitically a douche bag?

2010-07-29T10:41:00.000-07:00

I jumped into Bob's (Ashley Spungin's beau) psychic feline, van, last night and headed down to their show at Holocene in PDX. They were playing with Parenthetical girls (pdx) I liked their first album when I was still down with pretentious, whiny, queer, art, music. Not so down anymore!!!

Anyways I'm walking out of the bar and who do I run into but STEVE LOUIE!! BOOSH! He was down for the night to shoot the show and we get to talking and it looks like he's going to be in Cali when P.R.E. is so we exchanged numbers and fingers crossed he can come shoot one of their bay area shows. Steve is a fantastic photographer!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/stevelouie/

The Purple rhinestone eagle record release is tonight at Backspace if your in town call me at 503-804-1890.

Now back to doing my laundry.

Burning

2010-07-28T13:58:00.000-07:00

Day 3
I'm just burning and stamping disc's. Three minuet burn, stamp and repeat.
The tour kicks off in Portland tomorrow. We have a band meeting tonight, I have yet to meet the merch girl Sonrisa. Were stuffing albums as well, that'll be fun eh?! (Not)
I bought two bra's at Fred Meyers and the sales lady didn't take the security tag off of them so now I have to go back to Fred Meyers. Booooo!
A review came out in the Mercury and some other paper here in PDX of The Great Return.
They were good!

Tour diary, my dad made me do it!

2010-07-27T02:22:00.000-07:00

DAY1: My dad is living vicariously through me. He really wanted me to do a tour diary, so i considered it and thought, "well fuck why the hell not?"
I arrived in Portland today via the Greyhound bus. I made it across the border without even a second glance in my direction which is kinda annoying since i was prepared for trouble!

The Seattle Greyhound station is disgusting!! Sorry kids but it's really gross. Try pissing with all your luggage in that washroom, not good.

But I made it safely 8 hours later and right on time for Ashley Spungin to pick me up. Ashley is the drummer for Purple Rhinestone Eagle, "Amazing drummer" I should say! Her and I have spent three months communicating via email and one skype session only. So it was a bit strange to actually chat face to face for me at first. I guess i felt nervous? I don't really know? I have been working with musicians for so long that these sorts of things don't normally make me feel nervous, but i guess because i really care about these guys..... I had shaky hands for the first five minuets.
Anyways tomorrow i get to burn C.D's and follow up on some show loose ends.

Oh ya! TWO DOLLAR TALL CANS!! And it was Morgan's B-day. Also Jenk came down and met me for a drink and gave me an American cell phone. BOOSH!

SUMMER TOUR PARTY!!

2010-04-12T18:30:00.000-07:00

So i fell in love with Portland band, Purple rhinestone eagle last summer. I stayed in touch with them and went to Portland a few times and partied. Andrea, Morgan and Ashley are the nicest people you will meet! They also fucking shred! The listen to all the music i love, even obscure shit that i thought i only knew about. They also play the best fucking rock/psych/garage shit you'll hear!
I brought them up last weekend for two show's here in Vancouver. They killed it, everyone went nuts and had their minds blown.

I got an email on Tuesday from Andrea officially offering me the position as their Tour manager and booking agent for a month long tour in August!
I KNOW RIGHT!!???!
I'm so stoked and excited, I'm finally going to get to see New York city and everywhere in between.
Good things do happen to those who wait.

Check this shit out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZQz-Tr5myM

Goodbye Budgies Burrito's

2010-02-19T15:31:00.000-08:00

Budgies Burrito's 2006-2010
R.I.P
You've been a ride and i have no regrets!
Thank you Macey

Police state of mind

2010-02-06T16:31:00.000-08:00

I don't do well with authority, not even a little bit! Well unless they are female cops and they're hitting on me (crab park last summer that actually happened) but i mean how often are you going to run into female police officers that don't have a huge chip on their shoulders? Not often!

The Olympics have brought our city a police and military presence so large that it has only been surpassed by World War two.
i don't feel safer, in fact i may start building my immunity to pepper spray by rubbing jalapeno's in my eyes at work this week.
Cool eh! Go Canada Go!

Belated Xmas

2010-01-25T23:29:00.000-08:00

I had the pleasure of getting the swine flu over Christmas, the real deal too! Not just some shitty doctor being all like, "oh yeah take this anti viral medicine." (cha ching) No it was the whole bad enchilada.
I was supposed to fly out to Toronto and Montreal to see friends and family. Of Course my moral code of social conduct was working in overdrive the entire time, so i pretty much acted like a leper, and the world treated me like a leper, not even Milo the dog was around.
Because i missed Xmas i received my presents from my family today (Jan 25th).
I'm so glad i didn't have to sit in a present opening circle and have to pretend to love my brand new 2010 Olympic hoodie!
No seriously...

New bed linens

2010-01-15T14:49:00.001-08:00

I was at Winners today buying new bed linens when i remembered i had a blog!!
Sorry for the lack of blogging internet world. Do people still blog these days? Is anyone gonna read this?
I guess the lack of rambling, personal information about myself came out of my recent break up.
Eli and i split in September (again) but this time it's permanent.
There's not much one can really say about these sorts of things? I lost a lover a best friend a family a dog and somewhere around November my mind! What i gained though was a different perspective of myself, i was really not taking care of myself in the latter years of the relationship.
I was trying too hard to make my partner happy and have her needs met, when i was allowing my own needs and wants and desires to be put away in a box, thinking one day she would open the box up and go through it. That would never happen.
So i guess it was the simple act of buying new bed sheets today that made me realize that I've turned a corner. I'm coming out of the dark, heart broken moments of self doubt and insecurity.
There's nothing like clean, sexy, sheets to inspire a person to have passionate, hot sex with someone new! Come over for the sex but stay for the sheets....and more sex (obvie)

Here's a toast to being single! It's really not so bad, i mean i have my days. But when those feeling's creep over me I turn to my bro's and we play some nerd games, watch some hockey and talk about girls.
Perfect!

I've never kissed the loves of my life

2009-09-25T21:39:00.000-07:00

South park Murders

2009-08-09T13:51:00.000-07:00

So i was in Seattle a couple of weeks ago for Helen Reeds film, Twin Twin Peaks. I was staying at my buddy Scouts place and we called him to let him know we were close to pulling into his neighborhood of South Park which is a really cute area that's considered a little Mexico in Seattle.
He sounded a bit concerned on the phone and told us not to freak out if we saw a bunch of police and news vans out in fromt of his house and that he would fill us in what happened when we arrived.
Scouts neighbours a young lesbian couple that lived directly across the street from him were broken into and attacked randomly (or so they say, hate crime?) The one women was stabbed repeatedly and died in her home from wounds to her neck. The other escaped but was hospitalized with life threatening injuries.
Scout and his girlfriend were woken up to a blood curdling scream at 3:30 am, Scout ran out to see his other neighbour calling 911 and the one women bleeding to death. The Police told the community of South Park at an emergency meeting that they responded to the 911 call within 5 mins. Scout and others say it was more like 25 mins and that her life could have been saved.
Others told the Seattle chief of police that when they have called the police for help (various reasons) sometimes the dispatch officer would ask questions like, "Do you have immigration papers?" before responding to the call.
In the time i was a guest at Scouts i had numerous reporters ask me for my opinon and try to get an interview with Scout. We both turned them down, it was really akward, sad and surreal.
They also caught a suspect while i was there too. The Police drove up and down the street announcing into a loud speaker that they got the man! He turned out to be an unstable black male with a history of violence and mental health. Perfect victory for the SPD!
Scout was talking with the head detective and a member of the F.B.I and he said there was enough D.N.A evidence to convict the suspect.
Needless to say that night was a really hard one to sleep through, both Eli and I barely slept. Partially because of the murder but also because Scout had a number of loaded weapons in his house for "protection" and there was some talk of him buying some more hand guns.

We drove home to Vancouver the very next morning.

Shitty couples everywhere!

2009-06-26T14:00:00.001-07:00

So just be forewarned this is not a positive blogging in any way whatsoever.
But what the heck is with all my really, smoking hot, lady friends from East Van dating the biggest losers? Or the most boring dudes? Is the dating pool really that small for the straight community around here? That the hottest, most talented, strong women are just settling for some of these local characters just baffles me!
I know what your thinking, "Oh M.J. you just want to fuck all your friends!" That's not even it, i swear it! I just have a hard time grinning through certain hang-outs with certain couples. Take these ladies away from these Peter Van types and they are so outgoing, independent and funny. Then bring in the dude and it's all hehehehe tickles and whispers and everything they say or do is a miracle of epic proportions. BORING PEOPLE!! FUCKING BORING!!
Look i know we all get a little lonely and horny this time of year, but if it means sacrificing what makes you great to cuddle up to some dude, then i say go solo.
A close friend recently responded to my bitching about this very topic with this, "It's just the time of the year for annoying couples MJ, it will pass."
Good god i hope they are right!?
I want my girls back.....
And yes I'm fucking glad I'm Queer, more and more every single day.

Tanning compettion

2009-06-03T21:07:00.000-07:00

So the warm weather is finally upon all our Lilly, white, Canadian, bodies. So i thought this would be a good time to talk about sunscreens. Why the hell are they so expensive? Especially since the rate of the ultra violet index is so very, very high. You think "they" would hook us up? All that money spent on anti smoking/cancer prevention campaigns. Hello skin cancer is real people! My mom used to lather herself up with fucking oil and tan all day long. She just had a large chunk of her breast and stomach grafted due to skin cancer. It's hard though because we do look "healthier" with tans, don't we?

I have the best friends in the world.

2009-05-16T14:57:00.000-07:00

Whoa! I haven't updated this bad boy in awhile... Mostly cause shit's been pretty crazy latley. I'm running around with my hung over head cut right off.
I'm getting older on Tuesday and my loving friends have been kind enough to throw a party for me at the Cobalt. Macey's band is going to play their first show ever. They are called Needles and Pins and have TonyX and Adam in them too. Shelby is going to DJ under Thrashcan.
So much love! Seriously i get all warm and fuzzy! Legs made the poster and it rules. She's the best!
So fuck lets party, and lets go camping!!
Oh yeah if you come to the Bolt on Tuesday the cover is by donation with all the proceeds going to the GIRLS ROCK CAMP. BOOSH!

BINGO BONGO LUONGO!

2009-04-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

GAME 4
Tonight at 5 pm our time. Watch for Luongo to make a quick stop with no rebound at the start of the game, if he does this he will be unbeatable! Trust me i know these things...
GO NUCKS GO!

Why bother?

2009-04-17T15:22:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure i'm not a good flirt? Seriously! My flirting never gets me anywhere dammit!!
Babes think i'm cute, which is a far cry from sexy or hot. Cute gets girls who only want to cuddle you. Cute is safe. I want to be sexy, smoldering and reckless with your heart.
Summer is coming and there's nothing cute about seeing me in a one piece on the beach. I guess that's not going to help my cause?

Don't let your son go down on me!

2009-03-24T17:24:00.001-07:00

Elton John was speaking to me the other day. I was the mad man across the water, the tiny dancer, an older brother named Dan, a hockey fan looking for a fight, then i did the crocodile rock!

Are we gay yet?

2009-03-18T14:50:00.001-07:00

QUEERCORE is a cultural movement started by punks that were too gay/gays that were too punk. The term was coined in the mid-1980's in a zine called JD'S. This term is also often associated with the punk music genre homocore.
Vancouver needs a Queercore scene again!
Some folks have pointed out that music has little to do with sexual orientation and to develop a genre of music (or even a sub-genre like hardcore punk) around a particular sexual orientation or set of orientations, is foolish. Perhaps, in a perfect world I would agree that music should be about music and not about other things. But we don't live in a perfect world. We live in a white supremacist, homophobic, patriarchal world. So if we can use music to help confront those structures of oppression, let's do it! And besides punk rock, like rock n' roll, has always been about sex!
In the early 1990s that Riot Grrrl emerged. "In many ways the angry- girl genre owes its existence to punk homocore 'zines.." writes Emily White in Rock She Wrote. It follows that many of the participants, their zines, and bands like Excuse 17 were involved in both movements ^[10]. Along with Outpunk, independent record labels such as Alternative Tentacles, K Records, Kill Rock Stars, Lookout! Records, Yoyo Recordings and Candy Ass Records also supported and released material by queercore artists but in the mid to late 1990s several other small labels, alongside Outpunk, sprung up solely devoted to queercore.

Donna Dresch's zine Chainsaw became a record label as well, and began to release recordings by newer bands such as The Need, The Third Sex and Longstocking. Heartcore Records is another label, whose bands have included The Little Deaths, Addicted2Fiction, Crowns On 45 and Ninja Death Squad. These bands, many of whom are no longer together, constituted the 'second wave' of queercore bands which also included IAMLoved, Subtonix, Best Revenge and Fagatron from the U.S., Skinjobs from Canada and, from Italy, Pussy Face. Of these early queercore labels, Chainsaw and Heartcore are still active and are still releasing new material.

By the mid 1990s, zines in the U.S., such as Marilyn Medusa, and in Canada, This Is The Salivation Army, began to link queercore with a pagan sensibility; at the same time, other strands in queercore began to link themselves with Riot Grrrl, and still others with anarchism. Mainstream media coverage intensified when Pansy Division toured the U.S. with Green Day, but nonetheless, queercore remained a grassroots movement in flux. In 1996 in San Francisco, the Dirtybird 96 Queercore Festival presaged other queer music gatherings which occurred in the following decade. In the late 1990s and early 2000s, DUMBA provided an ongoing venue in New York for queercore bands, continuing in the path of Homocore Chicago and leading the way for other, similar clubs to come in the 2000s.

Check out these Chainsaw artists:

I'm going to try and do my Queercore part May 12th at the Cobalt, a very special Queercore BOOSH! Featuring FORSORCERERS www.myspace.com/forsorcerers (ex dresch members and Queercore Portland)
LOVERS myspace.com/loverstheband and theirwebsite www.holdmyclothes.com
with JUDY www.myspace.com/judyonjudy
Hopefully the local support will be 99 PROBLEMS?!! Im waiting to confirm them still.

If you want to get more involved in the Queercore scene you can contact: www.myspace.com/queercore3

I love these fucking guys!

2009-03-12T00:43:00.001-07:00

I love these guys so much i got a Ladyhawk stick and poke on my shoulder.
True bromance! If you see me i will show it to you with pride (Gay of course).

The first picture should be on cuteoverload.com i took it on Isla Holbox in Mexico.

I'm off to Portland for the weekend! I'm looking forward to it. I hear there's a vegan strip club there? Hmmm? I also heard that i could get married in a doughnut shop? God bless America!

I wipe counters all day long

2009-03-02T23:26:00.000-08:00

Seriously i wipe and wipe the same wet little steel counter all bloody damn day long. I get paid too and all, so i guess it's not that bad? What would happen if i didn't wipe that one spot though? Chaos? Hmmmm i hope so!
Here's some dangerous style.

I might be crazy?

2009-02-25T11:35:00.000-08:00

My dad's been really sick his whole life. Diagnosed with Bi polar, manic depression at 27.

His father wasn't well either, he beat him and my grandmother into a bloody pulp whenever he hit the bottle which was often. My dad left home at 15 scared for his life on a motorcycle and rode all the way to Edmonton.
That's where he eventually met my mom, knocked her up stuck around for 4 years trying to hide the mental illness until it over came him and they divorced. At the time my mom just thought he was a fucking asshole! Mental illness in the eighties was not really discussed or at least not really taken seriously.
My dad spun out and went back to Toronto and dated and worked manically. He drank and smoked and self medicated himself as much as possible.

He then met Melanie my now step mom they have been together since i was 6, so 22 years.
She has stuck by him through thick and thin. He was hospitalized in 1997, his depression goes in 7 year cycles. He spent 2 months in St. Paul's Hospital undergoing electric shock therapy. Yes that's right! They still were doing electric shock therapy in 1997 as a cure for depression.
My dad still Say's that if he hadn't undergone the treatment then, that he wouldn't be alive now.

I remember being a teenager growing up with a manically depressed father and being angry, really, really, angry. The thing was he would take his crazy out on me all the time and i didn't really understand because i was 14 or 16 years old. We fought all the time. Sometimes about serious things and then sometimes he would catch me off guard and freak out about the way the table was set. Our house was a battle ground and my step mom was left to referee.

I started to get pretty heavy into smoking weed. It was a great relief to not think about anything but myself and the cool way the world looked and my body felt. I was self medicating as well.

It was around 14 that i realized i wasn't into any of the guys at school... if you get my drift.
So i guess i had a lot on my plate when i was a kid? But i still feel lucky to have gone to school in Vancouver which was such an openly gay city. My father and Stepmother were more than supportive and still are to this very day.

My dad hasn't really worked in hmmmmm? like 15 years. He has a doctor in Toronto that he says can't even grow a beard he's so young. But he's supposed to be the best!

Over the last few years my dad and i haven't been getting along. It might be the distance? I just don't feel apart of his life the way i used to. I think the selfish, pot smoking, teenager in me is relieved to not have to deal with his disease on a regular basis.
It takes over everything! To the point where you start to feel crazy yourself. In fact they tried to take me into St. Paul's when i was a 15 and told me because his kind of mental illness is genetic that i may be sick as well. I remember i was trying to hold back my tears and anger as the doctor told me they wanted to test my blood to see if i was going to be "like" my father.
I told her to go fuck herself and walked out of the hospital.
I have never been tested.

In hindsight i wish i could have been kinder to my father over the things i truly couldn't understand because of my teenage youth. I wish my mother could have been stronger and tried to understand. I wish my stepmother didn't have to endure the fights and anger we both dished out at each other on a regular basis.
I wish my dad wasn't sick with crippling depression. He's so charismatic and talented!
But what are you going to do?
The world is what we make of it.
I think I'll pick up the phone and give him a call.

The customer is never right

2009-02-21T19:33:00.000-08:00

I was chased down the street by angry line cook today. It all started when Legs, Brad and I decided to grab some hangover breakfast at The Sunny Spot on Main and 10Th.
Our food took forever and when it came mine was cold! Not a little warm, but fucking COLD. So i told the waitress who seemed to understand what i was talking about. 2 Min's later an angry elderly man, who i was to presume was the cook (apron) came to our table. I told him my food was cold and i couldn't eat it! He then waved his hands in my face and told me it wasn't cold and to get out!?
I didn't even know what to say?? It was shocking. So Brad explained to him and legs added help and still this guy was so angry at me!! So he goes to the kitchen but stands in the doorway staring at me with pure fucking anger. I'm seriously dying at this point. The kids finished their meal up as quickly as possible paid the check and left. We all walked out of the place and all of a sudden out comes the waitress and she's screaming that we didn't pay the check! Which we did, except for me because of the crap food that i didn't eat. We explain the situation and then out comes the angry cook and he's losing his shit!!! Like seriously he's going off. She had to hold him back and he's screaming in my face to pay the check. It was a huge scene! Like seriously the whole neighbourhood saw this shit go down and their all thinking were trying to rip this wacko guy off, mostly because of the way were dressed and our ages, i assume. Then this "bystander" chimes in, "come on you guys pay your CHECK!" At this point i can't even believe this is happening. NO SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!! I'm fucking shit shocked and kinda scared cause he's screaming he's going to call the police. I wish he had honestly.
I have to walk by the Sunny Spot everyday to go to work at Budgies, it's just so awkward. All because my meal was ice cold and i couldn't eat it. It makes me sad, cause i don't know why that guy freaked out so hard. Anyways we were all super shook up for a good half hour after it happened and of course i had to go to work and serve food and customers all day long.
Oh well! I'm off to check out Pierced Arrows at the Railway club and have a few pints, a place where everybody knows your name.

Mantracker

2009-02-16T19:35:00.000-08:00

I watch a lot of T.V.! In fact i watched 6 hours of televised programming last night. I was not alone in the journey but my cohort will remain nameless. I'm not ashamed of this though, in fact i think it makes me smarter? I know that i should always wear gloves if I'm going to commit murder or some kind of wicked robbery. I know that the Sham wow is the best towel on earth! I know that the Simpson's are on at 12:00pm, 5:00pm, 6:00pm and 12:00am. I have learned how to play Texas hold em poker like a pro. I realized i may be from the late 50's and in a past life was an ad executive. I know every hockey score from around the league, everyday.
I may eventually become a meteorologist.
T.V. is my best friend. I do my best drinking in front of the T.V. I've had great sex in front of the T.V. I've learned that dogs can watch T.V.
"Were gonna have a T.V. party tonight, ALL RIGHT,
We've got nothing better to do, than watch T.V. and have a couple of brews!"

Not lady like at all

2009-02-15T00:05:00.000-08:00

When i was away in Mexico i realized that i spit on the ground far too often! I realized this because i wasn't spitting on the ground in Mexico. When I'm at home in Vancouver I will walk around and often i will spit. "It's a goddamn sunny day *SPIT*." "Jesus fuck i almost got killed crossing that street *SPIT*."

I guess it's a sense of entitlement? But if there was ever ground to spit on it should have been in Mexico! Not because it's not a beautiful place or because it's poor. It's because they don't have a drainage system and basically all their shit and soap and piss just pours into the street. So in the scheme of things my spit would be nothing. But yeah i should stop spitting cause it's not very lady like and soon it may lead to me blowing snot out my nose on Pender and Main.

The landfills are full enough already!

2009-02-14T10:53:00.000-08:00

Fuck this Hallmark Holiday! Now if you'll excuse me i have to go drink Champagne and orange juice with my beautiful girlfriend.

More bran please!

2009-02-13T14:39:00.000-08:00

I need to shit! Seriously! Like a proper banana shaped turd. Not rabbit shits or the mystery turd that disappears in the toilet. Yep this is what my blog is going to be like!

So legs has been busy setting up shows for Boosh Tuesdays and we've got a couple of good ones coming up , Feb 17th and Feb 24th @ The Cobalt, so you should check em out!

Very superstitious

2009-02-13T13:32:00.000-08:00

Mexico '09

2009-02-13T12:36:00.001-08:00

I just got back from a month long vacation in Mexico (yeah, yeah, i know) with my GF and I'm really depressed right now. Weird right?
The obvious reasons may be the sun and surf are no longer at my door step, and have been replaced with forced heating and toques. I don't think that's it though? It's more of an uncomfortable realization that i have to get back with the "social paradigms and paradox's," that make up east van.
In Mexico i didn't have to worry about who was going to be my new roommate? Or who broke up with whom? Or who's drinking binges were causing problems among their friends? Or what music venue shut down? Or who lost their job, or who, or who...... In Mexico i had to worry about whether or not i should have a margarita or a mojito? And whether or not they are 2X1?
So yeah i guess it's just back to reality for me and the rest of East Van has just been waiting to catch me up on all the goings on. So why hasn't my phone been ringing?

Rocky know's what I'm talking about

2009-02-13T12:30:00.000-08:00

What is this Blog thing you speak of?

2009-02-13T11:58:00.000-08:00

So I'm finally on board the Blog train, "toot, toot." Thanks largely in part to all my wicked friends and their wicked blogs. Whitney suggested i call it MJ's insane rants, but i thought that would be a bit too much pressure...to be insane that is, not to rant! I've got the ranting part down with or without the blog.